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PostPosted: Tue Mar 01, 2016 10:11 pm 
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http://www.aintitcool.com/node/74556

IDRIS ELBA as Roland?! That is even worst casting than when they were considering Javier Bardem. Roland is, in Eddie's parlance, "Long, tall and ugly", and that isn't Elba is the slightest. Elba is a great actor with tremendous charisma, but I don't like this at all, especially considering all of the disquieting rumors of starting the story "in the middle", whatever that means.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 4:42 am 
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Read they're going to spend a lot of time in the first movie in the real world. So Drawing of the Three. I'm guessing the thought was that The Gunslinger is too much of a slow burn.

And as for the casting, Elba looks about as much like Clint Eastwood as he does like Hoagy Carmichael.


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 9:13 am 
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Monterey Jack wrote:
Long, tall and ugly", and that isn't Elba is the slightest

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 10:59 am 
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Monterey Jack wrote:
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/74556

IDRIS ELBA as Roland?! That is even worst casting than when they were considering Javier Bardem. Roland is, in Eddie's parlance, "Long, tall and ugly", and that isn't Elba is the slightest. Elba is a great actor with tremendous charisma, but I don't like this at all, especially considering all of the disquieting rumors of starting the story "in the middle", whatever that means.


Well, the novels themselves sort of start in the middle. Roland's journey certainly didn't begin with his pursuit of The Man in Black.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 2:58 pm 
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Calm down, Monty. Everything will be fine.

Seriously though, at this stage we should just be glad we're getting a movie with high profile actors attached.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 8:18 pm 
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Yeah, no doubt.

But given that race is already a factor in the books, it does seem like Elba's casting would change things more than one would think. This isn't Heimdall in the Thor movies, where it can just be there, unaddressed. There's a dynamic in the books between Susannah and Roland that depends, in some part, on her being black and him being white.

Now, all that means is that they've got to change shit, and it sounds like they were changing shit anyway. But it does mean shit will be changed.


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 02, 2016 10:05 pm 
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Granted, the uncomfortable "Honky mahfah" dialogue from the books would have DEFINITELY been toned down or removed entirely from the film had Roland been played by a white actor (even in the books, Eddie makes note of how Detta/Odetta "talks like a cliché"), but, with a black actor playing Roland, I have this sneaking suspicion that they'll cast a white actress as Odetta if they want to keep the racism subtext in there. Of course, if these reports on the screenplay are at all accurate, will Odetta even be IN the movie? Apparently the only major female role they're casting is some woman who gets mentioned ONCE in the last book, and I can't even recall who she was.

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PostPosted: Wed May 03, 2017 9:45 am 
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Well...that looks like a movie, at least. It doesn't look like The Dark Tower in the slightest, but it looks like a movie.

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PostPosted: Wed May 03, 2017 10:40 am 
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Monterey Jack wrote:


Well...that looks like a movie, at least. It doesn't look like The Dark Tower in the slightest, but it looks like a movie.

I think you missed the parts that said THE DARK TOWER....

It is obviously entitled THE DARK TOWER.

It is even "official".

:unsure:

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PostPosted: Wed May 03, 2017 10:41 am 
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I just SNOPED it and it definitely seems to be THE DARK TOWER.

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PostPosted: Wed May 03, 2017 1:54 pm 
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FAKE NEWS!! FAKE NEWS!!

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 8:54 am 
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This isn't an adaptation of the books, it's a sequel.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 1:17 pm 
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Hahahahah, is that kid part of the books because that feels like a horrible addition to a movie adaptation, all WE HAVE TO GIVE THE AUDIENCE SOMEONE TO RELATE TO.

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 1:45 pm 
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JFelix wrote:
Hahahahah, is that kid part of the books because that feels like a horrible addition to a movie adaptation, all WE HAVE TO GIVE THE AUDIENCE SOMEONE TO RELATE TO.

My coworker said the kid did
Spoiler: show
not make it out of the first book in the series, he admittedly has not read the whole series, so maybe he comes back since dead is not always dead in books.


:unsure:

Anywho.

Since this is a continuation of the books and not the books, per se, I really don't see a problem with any of it.

The movie looks cool and it will be awesome to have a bad guy that drawls, "alright alright alriiiiight."

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PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 1:58 pm 
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Pender guessed right in that spoiler box.


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 7:55 am 
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Looks like the Tower is being viewed as a giant mound of shit.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 9:05 am 
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Well, quite expected from a movie written by Akiva Goldsman. The one review comparing it to 90s Steven Seagal action movies, actually made me want to go see this.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 9:45 am 
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Chris Knight wrote:
Well, quite expected from a movie written by Akiva Goldsman. The one review comparing it to 90s Steven Seagal action movies, actually made me want to go see this.

I was convinced to want to view it for it being a uniquely flavorless slog.

Uniqueness is not something to be dismissed lightly.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 4:16 pm 
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An adaptation of an epic book series that totaled over 4,000 pages of text spread across eight novels has been reduced to an August throwaway that runs a half-hour shorter than Girls Night.

:flip:

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 4:29 pm 
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Well, in all fairness, every time an epic Stephen King novel has been adapted to match the length of the story, the end result is awful. In fact, I'd argue only his short stories are suitable for adaptation, given that those are the only ones I've ever enjoyed.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 4:47 pm 
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The thing is, 95 minutes would have been ideal for a truly faithful adaptation of The Gunslinger, which would have been a mostly-standalone experience that still teased enough for a potential franchise, but this bullshit, "Oh, it's a SEQUEL to the novels, so it doesn't matter that 90% of it has fuck-all to do with them!" justification is nothing more that a studio trying desperately to backpedal. I'm sure that the forthcoming It will make more than a few liberties with the book, but the tone of it, judging by the trailers, seems spot-on, and the fact that it's going to run 135 minutes is a good sign...it's certainly not being treated like a B-movie throwaway. I could recognize multiple iconic moments from the book in the first trailer for It, whereas the ONLY thing in the Dark Tower trailer I could recognize from the books was Roland's "I kill with my heart" speech. And that's not even a scene or a visual...it's essentially just a catchphrase.

I mean, I enjoyed the movie version of World War Z, even though it shared nothing in common with the terrific book except for the title, but that was a movie with a sizable budget and a major star involved, and was entertaining despite some faults. The Dark Tower reminds me of the "GINO" complaints about that lousy 1998 Roland Emmerich version of Godzilla...this is DTINO.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 03, 2017 6:38 pm 
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Monterey Jack wrote:
I'm sure that the forthcoming It will make more than a few liberties with the book, but the tone of it, judging by the trailers, seems spot-on, and the fact that it's going to run 135 minutes is a good sign...it's certainly not being treated like a B-movie throwaway.

I don't know, man...

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 04, 2017 5:51 am 
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What I am getting is that this movie actually might be good for those of us that only have a rudimentary awareness of the books having existed.... Most of the "real" complaints were very much "it doesn't match the books" and "nothing of the epic King novels".

Meh.

I could not care less about all that.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 04, 2017 6:38 am 
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Kubrick's The Shining bears little resemblance to the source material. So much so, that Stephen King hated it, and remade the film decades later. Guess which version everyone remembers?

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:44 pm 
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:half: :nohole: :nohole: :nohole: :nohole:

Fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckyoooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

:flip: :down: :mad:

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 1:55 pm 
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Monty gave Covenant 3 stars, which we can all agree is a terrible movie that should never have been made. So, to give Dark Tower 1/2 a star means only thing - it's probably a decent movie.

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 6:54 am 
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Still haven't seen this, though I probably will soon. My son saw the trailer on the Spider-Man: Homecoming disc, though, and really thought it looked cool. I told him he probably wouldn't be seeing it anytime soon.

Then today, he's drawing a picture of "The Tower of Dom." (He meant "Doom.") He explains to me that it's based on the trailer he saw, and that if you reach the top, there's a button you can push that sends you back to the real world.

Which, given the end of the books, is sort of weird.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 6:59 am 
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Eric wrote:
"The Tower of Dom." (He meant "Doom.")

He interlude meant dom.

*whipcrack*

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 7:25 am 
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I watched this with my wife, who loves the book (books?). She didn't hate it, but - like me - would probably never watch it again. For me, it's pretty much on par with every other young adult dystopian film that's been released in the last few years. Boring cinematography, no emotional score, and a serious lack of imagination with the set and creature design (that sums up all these Hunger Games, Maze Runner, Divergent, etc. movies).

The biggest fault with this film is the lack of development (and motivation) for the magician guy - it's never explained what he gets out of it. Nor do we ever see what happens to the kids after he kidnaps them (after he uses them to attack the tower - do they die?).

Spoiler: show
So, he killed the parents - they sucked anyway.


Time Bandits did this better.

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 8:35 am 
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I love that Chris's movie criticisms often end on awesome notes like this:
Chris Knight wrote:
Time Bandits did this better.

:lol:

Did not see Dark Tower, have no plans to, have no dog in this fight. Just saying, that's hilarious.

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 8:13 pm 
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So, I've seen it now. It wasn't great.

Monty's full of shit that it doesn't have anything to do with the novels. That's not the problem. The problem is that it's a remixed, Cliff's Notes version of the novels. It has the same basic idea and some of the same sort of window-dressing, but cuts away huge chunks that you'd expect to see (re-imagined, given the sequel concept that cleverly builds on the ending of the novels, but still there), without any of the scope or world-building that would earn a satisfying pay-off.

They could've re-imagined and re-mixed things, and that would have been fine. The way the novels end gives a perfect excuse to do that, and to have it be canon and sequential, following the novels. But they couldn't do it in one movie. This is supposed to be the conclusion to an epic. The way they try to wrap it up in one film that can stand alone just doesn't work. They needed to commit to a trilogy or more, with no real resolution before the last movie, or just not do it at all. What they did instead is a cop-out.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 8:15 pm 
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I was under the impression that this takes place after the end of the novels; that it's essentially a sequel, starting the cycle anew. Is that not the case?

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 22, 2017 5:10 am 
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Yes, but the novels end at the beginning; it's circular, implying that essentially the same events happen over and over in a loop, but with a couple details that imply this next repetition might break the chain. So it's a sequel, but a sequel that starts over at the beginning AND has license, given the way the books ended, to change things up.

But with a seven (or nine) book series establishing the scope and stakes, that these are epic, mythic events playing out, you can't really end that shit in one half-assed movie.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 22, 2017 6:17 am 
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Gotcha.

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