Don't know if this is "I made it," really, since I won't have "made it" until Monday or so, but I'm going on the Bayview Port Huron to Mackinac race this weekend, and in the unlikely event that you want to check on my progress, you could do so here. I'm on the shore course, in the Cruising A class, on a boat called FreeWay.

I use that map to help determine my sniper position. Thank you.

_________________
-These are the demands and sayings of Ericubus.

In the future it will become even easier for old negatives to become lost and be "replaced" by new altered negatives. This would be a great loss to our society. Our cultural history must not be allowed to be rewritten. - George Lucas 1988

Do good shit, boat man.

_________________
"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Also, if you're ever here on a weekend, you can race. Our circle is involved in Catboat races on the bay. Crew members always needed.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Only single-sailed boat I've ever sailed is a Hobie Cat, one time on vacation. Can't say how good I'd be at it. But I'd gladly demonstrate how to drink beer after the race.

That's what they're racing.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

I'm on a Hobie Cat race crew tomorrow.

Usually I just drink beer and let the other folks do all the work. Guess I can't do that this time.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Several times during the winter, I get together with the boat crew to discuss strategy. I explain to my wife each time that it's necessary for us to get together to discuss strategy, and we do. I'm going to share with you the very strategic way we approach the races, and let you know what we decide on in these strategy meetings (before we go on to drinking):

Go fast, in the direction of the finish line.

I was wrong, they're not Hobie Cats, they're B Cats.

Anyway, good race tonight. Looks like I'll be crewing every Thursday from here on in.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

One hull or two?

If they're the sort I'm thinking of, I can't imagine "crew." Maybe fifteen feet long, with two rudders and one sail? That's a one-man boat.

One hull. Not sure of the footage, but I think it's between 22' and 26', probably leaning lower. Single mast, cabin (albeit tight) with two small bunks. It is absolutely sailable by a single person, but it'd be slightly hectic when racing. They usually do a crew of 2, I think. I was 3rd, so stretching it, but I actually had stuff to do while the other two were working, too.

The closest examples I can find with a quick Google are these, but they aren't necessarily even the same make, just the general gist:







Sort of a blend between these.

I thought I had good pics of the one we sail, but I can't be arsed to search through the archives.

I do have this brief video that maybe gives you a better idea of what it is:

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Watched the video. Is that boat wooden? How old?

Like I said, I've sailed a single-sailed boat exactly once. On the Mac race, we had a crew of 5 on-deck for a 42 foot sloop: a helmsman, one to trim the main (usually me, when I was awake), two on the foresail, and a foredeck guy for sail changes. On Tuesdays, we've usually got eight to ten guys on the boat, adding a tactician, another foredeck guy, and a halyard guy. But I can't see how many of those jobs would transfer to a catboat; you're not changing sails, and you can't have more than one guy trimming the single sail you've got, can you? What were you doing?

Went out last Tuesday. Races haven't started back up yet as boats trickle back down from Mackinac, so we went out on one of the other crew members' cruising boats. Least work I've ever done on a sailboat. We set the sails and turned on the autopilot, then drank beer.

Next race is this Tuesday. We won the spring series of six races, despite doing horribly in the Mac race (which is its own race, unrelated to the series of evening races). This will be the first in the summer series.

Doing this race again next Saturday. Tracking, if anybody's interested, is at the same link. Same boat. Class is currently listed as Division II (shore course), Class M (cruising), though they may possibly change designations when the tracking software goes live. The boat is still FreeWay, in any case, and you shouldn't need more than that.

Placed 7th of 17 boats in class, which is better than last year. Did my best at the awards ceremony, since we didn't have to pick up a flag or anything like that, to make Bells regret sponsoring the race and providing free beer. I think I at least gave them qualms about it.

Was supposed to crew my first race of the year today, but it was called due to wind. The horrible, unsettling plan B was to sit at the yacht club overlooking the bay drinking pitchers other people were buying.

Terrible day.

Now I'm home, so I'm going to get some jet ski time in.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Put a restored Dyer Dhow in the water today (the OB&C's father, not me, is the one into restoring old boats), and we had so little wind we could barely get it moving.

Next race is Tuesday. Not a big, overnight race. Just a 7-mile evening thing.

I don't crew on a big, cool boat like Eric, but it's fun.

Nonetheless, no sailing for me yet this year. It has fallen through each time due to wind.

Getting my own tiny little Boston Whaler rigged up soon for the first time since before Sandy and will start using it regularly. Looking forward to learning how to sail on my own. Living on the water, it's stupid to not do water stuff (if you can afford it)(which I can't).

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Remember, the term boat means either Bust Out Another Thousand, or a hole in the water that you pour money into.

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I'm going to wait until you're sitting next to Ericubus and then I'll ask how you're feeling. - caryc

They are a ridiculous money pit. There are no boats in my future.

There is sailing, though. One of those dudes is out for the season with an injury, so starting Sunday I am officially competing.

That sucks. I have only sailed once this year - last night. I am not ready!

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

We won.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Congratulations. Always nice to win. This the catboat you've (I believe) raced on before?

Boat I race on came in 2nd last Tuesday after having forfeited the week before because the boat wasn't ready after the Mac race (read: filled with liquor bottles from the guys who brought it back; can't wait to retire and take over that job). Same boat, which is usually our toughest competitor, took first in each of those. So we'd have to do pretty well in the three remaining races to take first overall again (though we got first in the spring series).

Words spoken a number of times on Mackinac Island: "Coming in seventh in a yacht race is a first-world problem." I was kind of pissed, until I thought of it in that light.

Mackinac race starts tomorrow. Still on Freeway. Tracking here if anybody wants to see how we're doing.

Just tried to track you but looks like you already finished.

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"Watch my stuff." - Monterey Jack

Finished about 1am on Monday, after hitting a storm 5 miles from the finish line with 40 knot winds, hail, and zero visibility. Reefed the main and rolled in most of the jib (which is to say "we greatly reduced sail area to slow the boat down") and we were still heeled over sideways and screaming ahead without any idea what was in front of us. Steering by GPS because we could see nothing. For about 15 minutes, I thought I might die.

Three days of drinking on the island, though, convinced me to come back next year.

Oh, and finished 6th of 23 in the class. No flag.

Amazing race today.

Fleet of six, not huge, but we're one point from being in first on the season, so it's important.

They give us two-lap triangle course and then in. The wind is weird as fuck. We hit the first leg on a totally different course than everyone else, open up a big lead, then in the final 150 yards we hit a wall and everyone catches up. It's tight, but we're in the lead. Cool.

First loop around the triangle we maintain the lead, though it's close as fuck. Crazy close.

We get a bit outside the mark halfway through lap two, horns go off, and oh shit, they're changing the course! Suddenly we are doing something way different than before, going far out into the bay to a spot we never race to.

The race tightens up. When going to that far out mark we slip into second. No shame, the best sailor on the bay is a ringer for the other boat, so it's not surprising that it got ahead of us.

From there, it's a straight run of about a mile or two back into the finish.

Four boats saddle up and are as close as you can be. For the quarter mile stretch leading into the final turn, there were literally three of us side by side by side, all perfectly even, trying to not bump one another (just feet apart) while jockeying for position, and the lead was just ten yards ahead. Tense.

We fought in that last stretch, rules and wind cleared some room for us on the final turn, and we ended up with a hard-fought second.

Awesome race. Fun day.



I wish we had won, because it would have catapulted us into the lead for the year, but there are four races to go. We can still take it.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

The boat that was our main competition for Tuesday night races switched classes. It's gotten a bit boring. We won the spring series and are far enough ahead in the summer, with two races left, that if we win on Tuesday, we may stay on the pier and drink next Tuesday, as there'd be no chance of anyone beating us if we don't race, but if we do, we could get hit with a protest and be unable to throw out that score (one of the provisions of the race club).

Good to hear your races are competitive. Not that I'll mind too terribly much. Drinking on a pier is an easy cross to bear.

Indeed it is. It's why I race.

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"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

This all sound like lots of fun, and a great way for old out-of-shape dudes to be 'sporty'. Very jealous.

_________________
-These are the demands and sayings of Ericubus.

In the future it will become even easier for old negatives to become lost and be "replaced" by new altered negatives. This would be a great loss to our society. Our cultural history must not be allowed to be rewritten. - George Lucas 1988

It's not my call, but I don't think we have to race next week. Came in first on Tuesday despite racing shorthanded and the fact that I was doing foredeck, which is something I've done once before in my life.

For those who care (probably few) and don't know (might even include Shoe, if he's still racing catboats), that means I was perched up on the bow of the boat while we were racing, helping the jib or spinnaker (the sails in front of the boat, as opposed to the mainsail) around during tacks and jibes and putting sails up and down. Didn't even fuck anything up, which shocked the hell out of me.

Other than grinding, it's one of the more athletic things you can do in a sailboat race. Which should put the lie to Ericubus's "out-of-shape dudes" comment.

I'm in my prime, Ericubus.

In my prime.

So you were fat when you were younger, OK. Yes, I am projecting, I really need to get in shape and have 0 motivation right now.

But, when sailing, when the call comes to slow down for something, do you ever get the urge to scream out, "Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!" Because I would, and it would be hard to fight that urge.

_________________
-These are the demands and sayings of Ericubus.

In the future it will become even easier for old negatives to become lost and be "replaced" by new altered negatives. This would be a great loss to our society. Our cultural history must not be allowed to be rewritten. - George Lucas 1988

That's been shouted. Along with "ramming speed!" Mostly when somebody who, by the rules, should give way to us fails to do so.

So far past his prime there isn't even a mathematical term for it.

_________________
"It's come down to Shoe scraping his opiate hardened shit balls from his asshole with a spoon
" - Kimfair

Oh, come on, he's barely a lot past his prime.

_________________
-These are the demands and sayings of Ericubus.

In the future it will become even easier for old negatives to become lost and be "replaced" by new altered negatives. This would be a great loss to our society. Our cultural history must not be allowed to be rewritten. - George Lucas 1988

In my prime.